Why You Should Care Less About “Ideal” Vacation Length

You’ve all been there. You’ve booked your flight and accommodations to that destination you’ve been dreaming about for years.

The higher-ups (or your parents, if you’re living in their finished basement), have approved your vacation time.

It’s time to excitedly tell your family and friends about your plans.

There’s always the one.

“Oh, you can’t really get a feel for a place unless you’re there for at least *insert arbitrary amount of time here.*”

Dejected, you start to wonder whether it’s even worth going to your dream destination at all. Your “friend” is quite well-traveled, after all, so she must know what’s what when it comes to how much time you should spend abroad.

You know what, though?

Screw your friend.

Let’s explore why the ideal vacation time is a fallacy, and why you should do what’s right for you, your family, and whoever else matters at that moment.

Honestly, unless that friend, auntie, or saucy co-worker is coming with, they should keep their mouths shut.

Plan Your Trip to Be as Long as You Want

I’m not sure where people get the idea that there is a right way and a wrong way to travel, and then go about imparting that great wisdom to their loved ones.

It’s all over the place, though, including in the world of travel blogging.

You’re not a “real” traveler unless your trip includes time with the locals, or people-watching at a sidewalk cafe, or reading a novel on a grassy knoll, they say.

Well, guess what?

Locals aren’t sitting at a cafe all day. They’re working, or at the gym, or diddling around on their phones.

Unless you’re doing all of those things, which means you’re not really traveling but likely moving somewhere, you’re not doing as the locals do.

READ MORE: Are you as introverted as we are? You can still travel. Here’s how!

People get especially judgmental when it comes to the length of your travel.

We’re lucky to enjoy the flexibility of slower travel these days, but we’ve built so many memories of shorter trips over the years.

Fun fact: We checked out Beijing and The Great Wall in four days. It was plenty, what with the smog there, and we didn’t feel like we were missing out on anything.

We’ve done day trips up to Sonoma from San Diego.

I’ll take whatever I can get when it comes to travel, whether that’s a long weekend or two weeks bumming around Thailand. When we’re abroad, around two weeks is typically our upper maximum. That’s what our comfort levels and budget allow.

Take even that with a grain of salt.

I don’t know you or your situation. I don’t know how many vacation days you have for the year, and whether you need to conserve some of those days for your annual turkey trot over Thanksgiving.

I don’t know about your personal obligations, or whether you need to take family vacations over the kids’ summer vacation, a pricier time to travel.

Your reasons for deciding on the number of days you’re able to set aside for that trip are personal. Oftentimes, it has to do with the budget you have.

You won’t see me telling you that you need exactly this number of days before you book a trip to Europe or New York or Kokomo.

Fun fact: There have been beaches renamed Kokomo after that Beach Boys song, but you’re not going to find Kokomo on any maps. They tricked us.

You don’t need a certain amount of time to “really get a feel for a place” because that’s not a thing. I’m also just proud that you’re out there enjoying the world.

Will I suggest that if you only have, say, three days in a place, you should probably stay put?

That’s more likely.

Will I tell you that it’s not worth it if all you have is three days in a destination?

I promise I won’t. You get credit just for putting yourself out there.

Is there a sweet spot for how long a vacation should be?

Some would say that there is an ideal vacation length because science tells us so. Honestly, a vacation is as long as you’re able to make it, but let’s look at the research.

The idea of an eight-day vacation as the ideal amount of time you should set aside for a trip has been thrown around for years. It comes from research a few years back from the Journal of Happiness Studies.

Apparently, by the eighth day, the science says you’ve acclimated to travel and relaxed a bit away from your day-to-day responsibilities.

I get that. If you’re traveling through some time zones, it often takes you a few days at the start of your trip to get over the horrors of jet lag or potential travel fails.

According to that same study, the benefits of vacation start to drop around the 11-day mark, well before the two or even three weeks so many bloggers recommend.

By that point, people are starting to get a little homesick, missing their creature comforts and routines, despite the leisure.

Again, that disproves what you may have been hearing from seasoned travelers in your life who don’t see the value in visiting a place if it’s under their imaginary threshold.

Note: Keep in mind, that as with all studies that rely on questionnaires like this one, the data’s only as good as your participants. All that really means is that for the people participating in this research, an eight-day vacation seemed to be the average ideal.

All I’m saying is that the ideal vacation is in the eye of the vacationer. I’m a get-up-and-go kind of traveler. While I do make sure I have plenty of time on my trips to indulge in all of the local delicacies, I’m typically doing and seeing a lot with my time.

I’m not some magical wizard who doesn’t succumb to jet lag, either. I just push through it so I’m making what I feel is good use of my time.

As such, I’ve had folks in my own life tell me I was doing it wrong.

That just smacks of privilege to me.

How to Respond to Judgemental Know-It-Alls

How should you react next time someone comes at you about your travel plans? Here are some scenarios that I’ve encountered in my travel life, and why you should just tell these people to buzz off.

You need to spend at least a week there to REALLY get it.

What does that even mean?

Sure, the more time you spend in a place, the more likely you are to wrap your head around transportation there, local customs, or the best places to get cheap wine.

It’ll take longer than anyone can really vacation to get on a deeper level with a place.

You’ll likely hear about travelers’ connections to some place or another from their trip backpacking through a country when they were in their 20s.

They spent time with a shaman or they found this super cute hole-in-the-wall place that knew them by name or they learned how to make dumplings from scratch.

That’s all great and must have been a life-changing experience. I’m happy for you.

Do you REALLY get a place if you’re there as a tourist, ticking off things that most locals may never encounter? That’s not how real people are living there.

You do you, traveler.

READ MORE: Are you typically traveling as a pair? So are we! Check out a few tips for traveling couples.

If I were you, I’d try to extend that trip by at least a few days.

If I were you, I’d keep my opinions to myself.

What a buzzkill. You thought you had planned a sweet getaway, and here comes the commentary that suggests what you’re planning isn’t as meaningful as you thought it’d be.

Here’s the deal: Your trip is meaningful because you’re setting out and seeing the world. You’re doing it on your own terms. That’s awesome and brave.

Note: Spending any time away from home is a sacrifice, and it isn’t feasible for everyone.

How lucky are you to be able to get out there and see the world?

I set aside a few days to sit around cafes and watch the world go by.

That must be nice. Do you do this when you’re in your home city? I don’t know you. Maybe you do, in which case, tell me your secrets.

My personality is a little too Type A for this, even if I had one week in the same city. All I’d think about while sitting around and sipping on foamy coffees is what I spent to get out to this place, what I could be doing or seeing instead, or what I could be eating.

I mean, I do like to get my caffeine fix, but it’s pretty quick.

This one comes from a place of privilege. This human is at a point in their life where they have enough vacation time to spend three days taking time on a trip doing nothing.

Most people don’t have that luxury.

If you want to spend a long weekend/week/two weeks at the beach, though, doing little more than catching up on the latest beach reads, I’m not going to judge that. Taking a vacation on vacation is a great idea. It’s rejuvenating, even, and good for your health.

It’s not my ideal vacation, as again, I’d feel like I was missing out on something. If that’s how you recharge, get after those umbrella drinks and kick it.

You’re only going to *insert place* for three days? That doesn’t count.

I no longer count countries as a sport, but I don’t judge those who do. If you’re all about that country-counting lifestyle, more power to you. At least you’re out there seeing the world, no matter the motivation.

Did you know that there are people out there who set arbitrary standards for the length of time you need to be in a place before it “counts” in their minds?

This is a real thing. I’ve witnessed it myself.

This one is especially ridiculous because I’m confused about why it’d matter if it counted for that other person. How much free time do these people have to care so much about what you’re doing with YOUR free time?

They’re not the ones going, and if they are, perhaps you need to reevaluate how you choose your travel buddies.

I spent *insert length of time that’s more than yours* there.

If you’re a pessimist as I can be sometimes, you’d believe this person was just trying to show you up.

Their experience must have been better than yours could ever be because they were able to spend more time at that destination you’ve been dreaming about.

If you’re more of an optimist and believe this person isn’t coming from a place of one-upmanship, you could see it as them reliving an experience they may not have again.

Perhaps this was that trip that really did it for them, or made them feel like a true traveler.

They’ve been telling stories of that one trip for years, so it obviously means something to them.

They’re being wistful, and maybe a little bit jealous that you’ll be forming your own memories in what they’ve come to know as their special place.

Either way, it’s an annoying thing to say.

Plan the trip you want with the time you have.

Travel can be quite a personal thing for people. 

You don’t know what someone has had to do to be able to take the trip they’re telling you about. This could be the only trip they take all year, for whatever reason that really isn’t your business.

Before you disparage what could be someone’s dream vacation, consider this: why are you so affected by someone else’s plans?

Sounds like a personal problem to me.

Check out a few more travel tips while you’re here:

• National Parks in the United States: Rules to Know
• Road Trip Tips for Traveling Couples
• Should You Study Abroad? A Detailed Guide
• Should Destinations Be Called Overrated?
• The Very Best Travel Pillow on the Market

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• All of My Reasons I’m Not Taking That Cruise
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